The spirit turned to look at Gabriel. “Hi,” he replied, their eyes meeting so Gabriel could see the mix of interest and confusion in them. “Are you an angel?”
Gabriel nodded. “My name is Gabriel.”
“I’ve heard of you.”
Smiling, Gabriel shrugged. “A lot of people have. Who are you?”
“I’m Knox.” Knox bit his lip. “Is there a reason you’re here?”
Answering that question meant admitting that angels, that Gabriel, had problems too, and he wasn’t sure he was ready for that. He thought of Samael, of the promises they’d made to each other, of what he’d have to admit when he finally talked to Death, before, somehow, managing to gather together enough courage to be honest with the spirit he wanted to be his friend.
“There is, but…” Gabriel shook his head, breathing deeply, and tried to find the right words to explain things. “What you may have read about the angels, about me, is often incorrect, because the people who write those books want us to be something that we aren’t. I’m not very good at being an angel and one of my colleagues… brothers… I have no idea what he is really, any more, but he made me promise him that I’d try to connect with the spirit world in a meaningful way.”
Knox looked at him, pity adding a new layer to his eyes, and Gabriel wished that he hadn’t been honest because he hadn’t wanted anyone’s pity. “Why do you think you aren’t very good at being an angel?”
“It’s not that I think I’m not very good at it. I know I’m not.” Gabriel sighed. “Instead of doing the job I was supposed to I hid from my responsibilities. I didn’t want to have to deal with the pain that the other angels all dealt with and the easiest way to do that was to not connect with anyone. Even though I live with the other angels I don’t have one that I could call a friend. I’ve never connected with any spirits the way the other angels have.” He shrugged. “The only reason I’m here is because I made a promise to Samael that I would try to be the angel I was meant to be.”
“How do you know that you haven’t done exactly what you were supposed to do?” Knox asked.
“What do you mean?”
“Maybe not all angels are meant to be doing the same thing at the same time. You may well feel like you aren’t a very good angel because you haven’t connected with anyone, but you might have spent the time being detached from everything for a reason, and the changes you’re making now are a part of your life plan.”
“I don’t know if angels have life plans,” Gabriel replied, thinking about what Knox had said and wondering if it was possible the spirit was right about him.
“Every living creature has a life plan, Gabriel, but not all of them know about it until their mortal life has ended.”
Mirrored from K. A. Webb Writing.